Automatic

Hellooooo, stranger.

Thursday, August 04, 2011 @ 11:19 AM

After 3 hours of desperate but futile logging in last night, and a bid to try to get to sleep... This morning when I woke up, the first thing on my mind was to try to sign in, again. When the password came to me, it was like a moment of enlightenment. *imagines rays of light shining above my head, and harp music playing in the background* And when the blog server finally accepted my password, I almost couldn't believe my eyes.

They say you don't know what you've got until it's gone.

I read through my past drafts and realised some of them were really quite gems. Except the old me didn't dare to post them up.

So, just wanna say, I miss you.

And my long hiatus is over... Let the journey begin.

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Quoted.

Wednesday, March 03, 2010 @ 12:11 AM

"... And quality friendship to me is being with the person physically but no conversation at all and yet we both still feel we had the most enjoyable day.

That is probably the highest level and requires very deep understanding of each other."

How true.

I can relate to this. And this feeling just feels absolutely wonderful.

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The Day After:

Tuesday, February 16, 2010 @ 2:25 PM

So he's gone.

And this is how it must feel like.

I did not cry when he turned around and left, strangely. Nobody else was crying either. I felt perfectly okay and stable when he walked through the departure gates, only with a slightly sourish feeling tugging and twisting on my heart strings, especially when his Dad commented that he had went in by the wrong gate.

I felt like I had kept my composure. You seem like a strong girl.

But then after that we bid our farewells to everybody.

And, they left one by one.

In groups.

His parents offered to send me home, but I declined... saying that my Dad was here to send me to my Uncle's house for CNY dinner.

So I went towards the entrance of Terminal 3, as far away from the departure gates as possible. I really could not bear to turn back.

That was perhaps the first time in my life I realised what a horrible, stagnant and cold place the airport could really be.

And I sat on a chair, you know, those new, plastic-like hard chairs that the newly refurbished T3 is installed with.

And then the warm tears started flowing freely.

Down my made-up face, onto my pretty white and pink ZARA dress.

Everybody was staring at the girl crying alone. Two soldiers walking into and out of the airport, on patrol duty. The lost and homeless guy sitting next to me. A mom with her child.

Argh. This really sucks.

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Doris Day... What A Legend.

Wednesday, December 30, 2009 @ 12:49 AM

Just listened to this song, and I can't get over how fantastic it sounds.

So 1960s Parisian chic and boudoir-like.

I simply cannot hide my absolute adoration and love for the old classics. Geez. So often I have wished I lived in the past.

It beats today's trashy music, hands down, over and over again.

This song really takes me back to a different era, it makes me imagine I'm in a 1960s cabaret with gentlemen in tweed coats smoking cigars and courtesans in skin-tight flare dresses dancing gaily around them.

Perhaps, perhaps, perhaps!

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When is it really the time?

Saturday, December 19, 2009 @ 7:58 PM

Decisions, decisions, decisions.

Decisions for things that have not yet arrived... ...

Decisions for invisible, unpredictable, random, perhaps even unforeseen circumstances.

I am afraid.

You're like a hot air balloon, still tied and firmly attached to the earth by a thick rope.

But the earth is getting loose with each minute the balloon fills up with steaming, searing, almost incandescent hot air. Like someone feverish with the anticipation of something new.

I want to be inside the hot air balloon, I want to be in the basket and rise up slowly exploring the whole world with you.

It will be fun, and exciting and mystifying, I promise.

But I touch the balloon and quickly draw back, my hands are too hurt and burnt. Its too hot. Its almost unreachable.

Untouchable, almost?

The earth beneath the hook cracks.

Its time. The thick rope is released, with a premeditated motion, almost cold and emotionless. Its been done a lot of times. Its just another cycle.

You rise up slowly, leaving the earth... dizzy with excitement, ecstatic about the new world.

Meanwhile I'm still grounded, firmly rooted. I call out your name. You hear me and reply, but your voice is now drowned out by the noisy, burning rage of fire.

A tear rolls down my cheek. Its warm from the heat of the hot air balloon. It tastes salty. A quick shot of reality hits me.

Am I destined to be on the ground forever?

Should I go back to my roots?

I know deep down I really yearn to... I dream to, long to, crave to. But I'm afraid. Of the whole world.

Afraid of the whole world.

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Decisions, decisions, decisions.

Friday, December 18, 2009 @ 3:55 AM

OKAY. I KNOW IT.

I WANT TO DYE MY HAIR. *firm and resolute tone*

The straw that broke the camel's back came last night when I saw my bestfriend's hair in a very lovely shade of mahogany brown with delish caramel highlights. It looked so divine glowing in the light by the pool.

But the thing is, what colour should I dye?

Its not that I don't like my hair colour now, I am pretty satisfied with black. Heck, I've had it for 19 years. Also, the best colour that suits you is usually the colour you were born with.

Hmmmmm.

I'm thinking of dyeing my hair in a dark colour because I'm pretty fair. My face, that is. Can't say the rest for my body. Yeah, I know I'm duo-toned and weir.

Did some research and I think I will be dyeing my hair at Clover Salon or Maison Hairmake in Far East. Both are highly recommended. So I hope it turns out well.

Will post a picture here after I finish provided it does not look like a disaster.

I'm willing to pay slightly more for my first time as I am a highly cautious person and very particular when it comes to my hair and skin. Thus, I would prefer my first dye job to NOT be BOTCHED.

Anyway like any sensible and responsible person, I googled and found a picture. I like this colour.

Note: Like me, she has pretty fair skin, although she's a little more cool-toned instead of the warm fair tones that Asians have. A rosy pink under-tone instead of the more sallow yellow undertones of Asians.

Or something close to this colour.

Girl on the extreme left. *Credits to sweatlee.com*

And I want to cut my hair shorter like this.

On the RIGHT. *Credits to er, unknown girl on Flowerpod? Thank you for posting up your picture.*

Anyway my hair kinda looks like the left now as you can see from my user picture on the sidebar. Unkempt, messy and a generally can't-be-bothered look.

Okay, hope I don't look sallow and unhealthy in dyed hair or something.

I need moolah.

Wondering if I should take up the waitressing job at a cafe with dear Irene or go to Recruit Express in a vain attempt at finding another job. Or go back to my old company where my boss and colleagues were really nice to me and loved me. Thats what everybody has been telling me to do now.

ARGH.

I can't stand this tai-tai life anymore, hanging around and just doing nothing.

Anyway, going to the ICA with Henry tomorrow, need to turn in early. Goodnight everyone!

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